bleh

Today I feel like crap. I have no clothes left to wear. Nothing fits, I get SOOOO sweaty and hot and uncomfortable - and this is inside a well air conditioned building, not to mention outside in the 90 degree humidity.

After all this induction appointment business I got a phone call from the doctor's office that they needed to cancel my regular doctor appointment for this week. They had practically no slots left for the entire week, except for one the same afternoon. It didn't really fit in my schedule, but did I have a choice? The lady actually asked me if I was going to show up for the appointment. I asked if she had any other suggestions - there's one appointment, I'm 39 weeks pregnant. Did she think I should skip it?? So I went. I asked them to confirm my induction date, but waited on hold forever until I just decided to ask when I got to the office.

The lady responsible for scheduling the inductions said she couldn't do anything with my request until Dr. Picco came back to town (Thursday) to verify that this was okay. Dr. Picco is the one who TOLD me to make the appointment, who said I needed to, and I needed to by Monday. So I rushed around trying to make all these changes on this deadline and this is what the lady told me. She said Dr. Picco had to make sure it was okay that I wanted an induction. Hello!! I don't want it. I was just trying to follow their stupid rules. She said I had to talk to the doctor I was seeing today about what to do.

Then I waited ages and ages for my appointment. I tried to calm myself down, knowing they are going to take my blood pressure and not wanting them to make any decisions based on an elevated reading.

The doctor was in and out of that room faster than you would believe. He basically told me that my cervix is closed and nothing else is going on. When I tried to ask something he kind of cut me off saying that's it, and was out the door before I could ask him anything else. I went to his office afterward, but by then I was over the fact that I had questions. I figured anything he told me would be rushed and not the kind of detail I was looking for anyway.

So the doctor starts telling me I need to consider scheduling an induction. What is wrong with these people?!?! I told him I already tried doing that, but was given a run around. ANd when I told him the date I wanted he just flat out said I couldn't do it that date. He said only the 21st, the 23rd (our wedding anniversary, by the way), or the 24th. He then proceeded to have the nerve to TELL me he was laughing at me because I thought I could plan everything and you can't plan anything when you have kids - he should know, he has two grown ones.

So I basically felt cornered into picking a new date after all this. I picked the 23rd. Only because the 24th he'd be at the hospital and I don't want him delivering our baby, the 21st was too early, and that left me with the 23rd. By this point, I was just trying not to burst into tears in his office.

Tuesdays have inevitably end up being the day of the week when I cry. I thought those crying Tuesdays would be over with our childbirth classes. Those days are just so long that I get impatient and tired and grumpy. But don't worry, folks. I came through. I just sat on a bench outside and cried and cried because I was so frustrated with my whole day of doctor office dilemmas. Can't they be a little nicer and more caring with ladies who are 39 weeks pregnant in the middle of the summer?!?!?!?