Normal? What is that anyway? We don't quite know what it is for us anymore. But last week was the first week that I decided to get out and about with just the kiddos and me.
We went to a friend's house for a delightful playdate including chicken chasing, goat petting, holding baby chicks, drawing in the camper trailer, and making barrettes. WOW! The kids had a blast, and G's friend gifted her a sweet necklace with an "S" for Simone. Wednesday, we had some dear friends over to our house, Thursday, my parents and aunt and uncle came for a visit, and I took the kids to the library. Friday was park day and then our Family Fun night which usually includes watching a movie.
Saturday it was off to Gilroy where the kids spent the day with Grandma and Grandpa at Gilroy Gardens while us grown ups enjoyed a wine stroll with Nate and Meliss and Noal and Elizabeth. Yep, we had some real live grown up time. It was such a treat. After dinner out with these lovelies, we headed back to the house where the kids finished a movie before driving back home so we could get back in the car and visit Heather. We spent the day there watching the kids play in the pool, catching up on baby Linden's birth story, and trying to help out a little.
It feels comforting and strange at the same time to resume our regular activities. Every day I wonder how it would be if Simone were here with us. I feel uncomfortable when I feel like things are okay. because how can they be? We are supposed to have a baby in our arms, who is constantly growing, starting to smile, interacting with her big brother and sister. Gabriela, that sweet girl of mine, asks me regularly what Simone would be doing if she were here with us. It's so sweet - Would she be in the moby wrap, Mom? If Simone were here, would she cry a lot? And the real kicker from the other night, Did Simone know how much we love her? And I told her of course she did. She could hear us talking to her, singing to her, reading her stories. We all loved her so much, how could she NOT feel that love?
I'm so glad Gabriela thinks of her sister as often and as sweetly as she does. I don't ever want Gabriela to think that it's not okay or appropriate to talk about her sister. Simone is a part of our family and we can honor and love her and her memory by not treating her death and very short presence with us as a forbidden topic.
1 comment:
That G of yours is so sweet. I love that she's thinking of Simone so often and making sure she knew just how much she was and will forever continue to be loved.
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